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Beneath the very crust of the earth, a remnant of a life once lived rummages through the wreckage of the old world. Its clammy, boney hands caress inexplicable objects from the lost society above, its simple mind unable to comprehend their worth or meaning.
Something catches the creatures eye, something unnaturally preserved, seemingly immune to the ravages of time. With uncommon care, the beast inspects the small, leather bound book, taken with its beauty. It can almost hear a soft, intimidating whispering, inviting a closer look.
Suddenly, the artifact bursts open as an ungodly, shrieking noise erupts in the dank cavern. Blinding light illuminates the creatures visage, as it stares, frozen in terror at the contents within.
For the first, and last time, the creature speaks, screeching the words contained within as it is locked in petrifying horror:
'ITS TIME TO MEET THE STAFF!'